I used to think that I cannot acknowledge my feelings, least of all express them. It’s not safe. Ever heard the phrase, “Emotions has no place in the workplace”. I spent years – yes years thinking that I can’t feel. And I brought in lots of masculine energy to the workplace. Focus. Do the work. Detached from emotions.
Why did I say masculine energy – like men are not supposed to feel. And you know what, when I was growing up – I hear this Chinese saying a lot – Men shed blood, not tears. Wow! And I bought into that as well. Sheesh… the amount of believes I bought into….’
Well, here I am and I recently realised that acknowledgement of my feelings is a good thing. Yes. Acknowledge and then release. Why is it so good? Coz you get to connect with you. Who you really are instead of suppressing yourself.
No – I do not mean that you start to feel bad and moan for days… er… sometimes you do need to do that, depending on how serious the situation is. Like when my dad passed away – I didn’t just feel bad for days, I felt bad for 2 months!!
Ok. Lost our track here. I am talking about emotions in the workplace. So when did anybody invented that you cannot feel. That’s so strange and absurd. Aren’t we humans and if we don’t feel, then what are we? Robots who just zombie through the day…. Of course we feel. And I would like to give you permission to feel. Please feel the upset. Acknowledge that you feel bad. Then let it go…..
It is easier said than done but it’s a practice.
Most importantly, acknowledge than let go.
Please don’t get me wrong and think that its ok to drama. It’s never ok to drama. What I mean by drama is shouting, being rude, condescending, cry and create a REAL DRAMA in front of your colleagues or bosses. That’s not professional, and it does not do anyone any good. If you want to cry, do it with a friend or by yourself (whichever makes you comfortable)
I guess what I am really trying to say here is that we don’t need to buy into the belief that we cannot feel and we then resort to supressing our feelings. And then we lose touch of ourselves. You see, when you lose touch of yourselves. You lose a part of you.. And the effect - quite detrimental in the long run. Seeps in slowly into your being and your soul. It will cost you, it cost your confidence, your authenticity etc etc…
Such a big part of us will be lost if we constantly supress ourselves. You would be surprised that one day that you don’t even know what you want or you think things are OK because you just put up with it. Thinking it’s ok, when it’s not. Yeah…. That’s what we are all very good at doing. Numbing ourselves with alcohol, work, drugs, sex and what have you…
Suppressing our feelings is equivalent to numbing ourselves. Numbing our pain. That’s not acknowledging or being kind to ourselves.
So I would like to encourage you to acknowledge your feelings – when it comes up. If you feel happy – acknowledge it – celebrate!! Rejoice!. If you feel sad, acknowledge the feelings. Let yourself feel the feelings. Sadly nowadays, I will be speaking to my friends and I would note that something is worth celebrating, they just told me but they speak of it like they are telling me they are having eggs for breakfast. Celebrate!! If there is a cause to celebrate. Live life! Embrace life!
On the contrary, if you are sad, depressed, fearful. Hey, its ok. Acknowledge the feelings. Ask yourself. What can you learn from it. Accept that you are human and move on..
In the process of acknowledging your feelings – the good – the bad, the wonderful, the joyous, the celebration, the fears, you will learn to know yourself so much better and accept yourself as you are.
Does this resonate with you? Did this post help? Leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.
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